-

i hate the feeling of hating something
but you just cant get rid of it cos the
damn thing is part of you. and even
if someone can tell me otherwise, i
don't think it can ever change my
perception towards it because its not
in you. its in me. whatever it is, i'll have
to deal with it.and i hate it so bad
to the point of rolling in a ball and
crying myself to sleep just so i can
shut it out of my mind for those
few hours where my mind isnt
functioning and reminding me of
how this kinda shit chose to
exist in my life. i know i should be
grateful for everything else im not
insecure about. but in this world
with crude people and their crude
remarks, i dont think its very easy.

fuck insecurities. the only thing
that's gonna get me through this is
removing the whole damn thing from my
life. and one day. i will. and i cant wait
for that damn day to come. where maybe
a certain level of confidence can begin to
bloom in my life. but till then, just fuck it.